|
| you know what i hate about america? you can't go to school without debt. how is it they want, and insist that we all get some sort of degree so we can actually make something of ourselves...but when it comes to helping us get there-they turn their backs?! In Spain it only costs 800 euro-even at some of the most prestegious schools! And in Germany...it used to be free, but now maybe 500 euro or so! They WANT you to get an education! And they actually have it at a price that people can afford without being in debt the rest of their lives.
Spain changed me...it changed what I had once pictured my future to be like. I want to go to school longer so I can get familiar with more languages, and get a double major in spanish and business. Once my dad got drift of this he said we need to talk bc he wont let me graduate with debt to start out my new life. Of course that's the smart thing, and of course it would be very good if i could graduate without debt. But my god! I've allready given up one of the things I love to please him. I'm majoring in fucking business for god's sake! I hate it! These years I've been doing business, I could've been doing a lot with theatre...and maybe even made it. But no...I'm doing the "right"...no the "smart" thing. And when I find something that COULD help me in the business world...or in any job at alll...I'm being condemned for it bc to simply increase my knowledge, it will cost more money!
How fucking backwards America is. Until they give us a way to actually get a god damned education-why dont they shove it up their asses when they insist we have a degree to be able to live comfortably!
Fuck America | | |
| and it has taken this long for me to realize how much i miss europe every day things i once used to love seem so petty now. i can only wait and long for the day that i am to return. i've found my home. and now, i am torn...yet again! before i had left for my wonderous journey, all i knew and wanted was theatre. everyday i woke up and thought...only two more years until i can pursue my dreams. but now...god. i dont know what to do. i am now hungry for other cultures, other languages. I want to learn other languages and go to the countries i have always dreamed of going to and talk to people. learn more about them. but if i'm to do that...where will theatre come in? when i am old and even more weary of this country? when i have spent to long of time out of theatre and can no longer fake a smile? how long can one actually pretend to be happy? what if i.... what if. that damned question. life is full of it. what if. i suppose i'll leave at that. | | |
| ok sorry it took me so long....spain is freaking amazing! Its beautiful, its clean....I love it. I cant even begin to describe how different it is from america. The people are so much nicer and so much more open to eachother. The family i live with is very nice too. Its amazing how well the brother and sister get along. And everyone does their own chores without ever complaining! And they always have dinner together-as a family. I love it. I never want to go back...although I do miss many of you. Tambien la gente aqui habla muy rapido y por eso es muy dificil entender. Con solo dos dias, mi espanol majorar mucho! Esta enamorado con esta ciudad. Fuimos a una discoteca, and barros todo el tiempo. Y aqui tienen una bebida que se llama Kali-motxo. Que rico es! Bueno, tengo que salir. Hasta luego! | | |
| and do we open our hearts once more?
only to be trampled on once again.
it seems there is no ending.
just as quickly as we fall--
are we picked up again .
only to find that reality is not what we'd once thought.
words so sincere--so beautiful...
i should have seen this coming
i should have known
words spoken as if from a script
one that has been tweaked over and over again...
becoming ever perfect for the next passerby,
the next poor soul who falls for your music and your voice.
oh how stricken we women are for the voices of angels
though now i know.
with a voice too sweet--
it simply can not be true
you have had your fun....yet your time will come
watch closely to those you "piss" on
for they may be waiting for it
and they will strike upon you what has long since been coming
| | |
| time is running short
to think it's coming so soon!
in not even a weeks time--i'll be thrown into unknown land
untouched air...unseen skies
i can't wait!
a new and beautiful journey is before me.
i will come back a new woman :)
| | |
|
